Dealing with friends and family going to uni or college

It’s getting to that time of year when people start going back to or start university or college. This year for me it was my brothers second year and a close friend of mines first year and as she is leaving tomorrow we wanted to see each other, have a catch up and say our goodbyes. Us being big food lovers we went to a local café close to where we both live (she lives about two streets down from me) and had our little moment in a child’s park on the swings. Classy, we know!

Although it’s a new and exciting chapter in their lives it can be hard for them and the people they may be leaving to deal with not being able to see their friends and family as often. These are my tips to make it easier to deal with this process.

·      Make time to see them – this is for before and after they leave; just save time for each other. This doesn’t mean try and see them every second of every day before they go or try and see them the weekend after they leave as this will just make the process more difficult for the both of you.
By giving yourself either the morning or evening with that person it allows you to get to see them and do the things you would normally do together without stopping them from seeing their other friends and family members.

·      Communication – Staying in contact with the person is an obvious one but this doesn’t mean messaging them 24/7 as soon as they leave as this will also just make it more difficult to deal with the process. Also, don’t expect them to reply instantly and be able to talk all the time. University/college is hard work and they will have other commitments such as trying to meet new people.

·      Social media – Social media nowadays has made it very easy for people to stay connected and see what people are up to. Due to this you can create a group chat and keep your whole friendship group connected or create events, which will bring everyone back together, such as reunions.
Get skype and talk to each other on that. Although its not the same as being with them in person but it’s the next closest thing and allows you to do other activities, such as cooking, cleaning or even class work but allowing you to still spend time together at the same time.

·      New friendships –You will all be in new situations that will involve you making new friends. This isn’t a bad thing and isn’t an excuse to ignore your old friends. You will need to try and balance both your old and new friends and make time for them both. A good way is by introducing the two groups so if any jealousy occurs they can see that they are all there cause you like the same person which may mean you have other things in common.

·      Drifting – As much as it may hurt sometimes, people just move apart and this can be due to distance or lack of time for each other. It doesn’t mean they never cared about you its just you will be in different places and in different situations and that may mean you wont be able to talk and see each other as much as you would have liked. Although it’s a horrible thing to go through you have to think that it may be for the better. If you care enough about each other you will make it work and find time for each other. If not then maybe it wasn’t meant to be.

My last and I feel is probably the most important, don’t get jealous. Just cause they are making new friends and are having a good time without you doesn’t mean they have moved on and have forgotten about you. Just because you two aren’t together at that moment doesn’t mean they shouldn’t be having fun. New friends will come but that’s not them trying to replace you and you shouldn’t feel that way, especially if both of you are making the effort to talk to each other and stay connected.

Overall though, I wish you all the best of luck whether you are going off to university or college or having someone close to you going. Try and make the best of the situation and remember every thing happens for a reason.

Talk to you later x

*Picture from pinterest.*